Santino Fontana & Laura Osnes Got Trouble (Trouble, Trouble), Aaron Tveit Moves His Butt (Butt, Butt) & More Lessons of the Week

After a long, hard week of work (and by "work," we mean watching YouTube videos), there's nothing better than pouring a martini, opening a giant bag of these and catching up on this week's Broadway news! Some really weird stuff happened this week: Aaron Tveit sang "The Thong Song," Sutton Foster scolded us about our cell phone use and Norm Lewis proved that he might be better suited to play Christine than the Phantom. Check out the Lessons of the Week below!

Aaron Tveit Wants to See That Thong
You heard us. Aaron Tveit’s go-to shower song is the 2000 Sisqo classic “The Thong Song.” He even performed a snippet for us (complete with some scrubbing under the arms) on Show People. You’re welcome, Tumblr. You’re welcome.

Sutton Foster Knows You're Texting
Before you return that one super-important text from your Grandma during Sutton Foster’s big 11 o'clock number, just remember this: SHE CAN SEE YOU! The Tony winner tweeted this very statement, leading us to believe someone actually had the nerve to do this. For shame!

Norm Lewis Sings Higher Than Sierra
What did we learn from this week’s episode of Daae Days? Well, for one, Sierra Boggess looks great in the Phantom’s Red Death costume. But we also learned that her co-star Norm Lewis has a really gorgeous, womanly falsetto. Anyone up for Freaky Friday: Phantom of the Opera Edition?

The Royal Family Is Moving to Iowa
Santino Fontana and Laura Osnes are the closest we mere subjects have to Broadway royalty (well, except Queen Lesli)—so we’re overjoyed to see them teaming up in a concert version of The Music Man. Oh, and BTW? We so called this. Never underestimate the power of Broadway.com dreamcasting.

Adam Jacobs Always Carries Hair Stuff
In the cast of Aladdin, you'd think Courtney Reed, who plays Princess Jasmine, would be the star most concerned about her coif. Nope, it’s Adam Jacobs, who carries a bottle of hair product with him wherever he goes! You never know when you might need a little touch-up, right, Tracy Turnblad—oops, we mean Adam?

Burgers Are Part of the Cinderella Diet
Before nabbing the title role in the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical, Cinderella star Paige Faure had childhood dreams of becoming a ballet dancer. Then, a greater love made her reconsider: “I realized I really like eating burgers and stuff." It’s nice to know princesses enjoy Shake Shack just as much as the rest of us.

Steve Martin Can’t Multitask
Mr. Martin, we’re psyched that you’re hard at work on your new musical Bright Star with Edie Brickell. But do you really have to take a “Twitter hiatus” to keep yourself from getting distracted? Lin-Manuel Miranda managed to write two musicals (one full-length, one mini) this year while tweeting every 3.5 seconds—it’s not that hard.

Rum Tum Tugger Is a Raptastic Cat
Cats is prowling back to the West End, and all of our favorite felines are back, including Grizabella, Rumpleteaser and of course, Rum Tum Tugger. Oh, except Andrew Lloyd Webber says the curious cat is going to be a rapper this time. If he doesn’t wear a silver mouse medallion and lap milk from a pimp cup, we’re going to be very disappointed.

LaChanze Is the Keeper of the Snacks
If you find yourself backstage at If/Then, make sure to stop by Tony winner LaChanze’s dressing room. One, because she’s awesome. Two, because she has all the good snacks. (Oh, and if you want to grab some extra Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Oreos, we’d be happy to take them off your hands.)

Idina Menzel Knows How to Play Ball
America is the land of the free and the home of If/Then star Idina Menzel, so naturally, she's singing the National Anthem at the MLB All-Stars game. Here’s what we’re picturing: Menzel stands in the outfield, and when she sings “rockets red glare,” a hydraulic lift shoots her into the sky in a puff of green smoke. If this happened at every baseball game, we’d actually watch baseball.