On episode four of GCB, Tony winner Kristin Chenoweth returns as TV’s favorite churchgoing millionaire, Carlene Cockburn. When Carlene’s uncle Burl comes to Dallas to visit, the plastic surgery-loving fashionista and her friends attend a Texas-themed costume party. But after catching her son Landry in a compromising position, Carlene is determined to bury the hatchet with her old high-school rival, Amanda. We’ve selected the greatest Cheno-Bits from this week’s episode for your reading pleasure. Enjoy, y’all!
Name: Carlene Cockburn
Motto: “Thou shalt not snoop.”
Costume Changes: 5
Cutest Outfit: Dale Evans costume (pink cowboy hat, black miniskirt and pink boots)
Tallest Shoes: White satin ruffled heels
“Nail Girl”: Chardonnay
Rented Horse: Buttermilk
Real Estate Investment: Condos for Christian Livin’
Best Excuse to Leave a Party: Getting a venison jerky stain on her shirt
Church Wardrobe Advice: “A bunular display like that is precisely why a lady never wears pants in church.”
Costume Party Compliment: “I love your Selena. Someone shot her, right?”
Geography Lesson: “You live in California. Everyone’s touching themselves.”
Literary Wisdom: “Only one man does magic and he’s from Jerusalem, not Hogwarts.”